Tempers, tears, and tantrums are not uncommon to children, especially toddlers and preschoolers. Why is this the case? This is because they have little or no control over their emotions, more so is the fact that they are easily frustrated if they are refused an object, toy or anything at a point in time; and so, they resort to tantrums to make their wants or needs known.
Let us also point out the fact that children are as much of attention seekers as attention lovers. They love to be cuddled, kissed, hugged, and comforted so much. In sum, they love to be affirmed. Unfortunately, they do not know that they cannot have their way at all times, and as such, parents need to help them have control over their emotions. They can do this by teaching and guiding them to realize that they can control their emotions, as well as recognize that they cannot always have all that they want, or have their parents around them at all times.
In addition to this, parents need to understudy their children to tell the difference in their whimper, tears, yells, tempers, and tantrums. It is interesting to note that mums seem to possess that superpower zing to balance all things, kids inclusive. They only have to listen awhile to the child to be able to tell that he or she needs to be put to sleep, is hungry, or is in discomfort. This tends to confound a lot of dads who suddenly find themselves alone with toddlers, who feel five minutes seem to take forever to mind the baby.
TIPS TO EFFECTIVELY HANDLE CHILDREN’S TANTRUMS AND TEMPER
We would be considering several ways to effectively handle children when they come up with one tantrum or the other.
- Maintain your calmness: most times, tantrums from children offset their parents, and this leads them to respond to their children in anger. This usually results in the escalation of the whole drama, while the recipient parent is unsure of how to appropriately react to the child. Imagine raising your voice above that of a yelling child in a bid to pass a message of calm; It would undoubtedly cause more noise. Since you are the mature person, exercise control over your irritation.
- You may also need to distract such a child with something else since their attention over an object or toy of interest cannot be sustained for a long time. So it might be advisable to replace the object in question with something else. However, there can be some limitation when you are on an outing. In this case, having a snack, chocolate bar, or candy may be a life-saver and a huge relief to you.
- Affirm your child. There is a need to positively talk to your child, especially when you are correcting him or her. Parents often forget to do this, more so when they have other sources of pressure weighing them down and competing for their attention. Hence, you need to learn how to control the tenor and tone of your voice in a correction. Affirming your child from quite a tender age goes a long way in setting a solid foundation and boost for your child’s self-esteem and positive outlook on situations later in the future.
- It is inadvisable to give in to your child’s tantrums. This is because they might take advantage of it if it makes them have their way. Hence, ignoring the stunts they pull is the better choice for you, rather than reacting in anger and being sorry minutes after for being extreme.
- It might also be helpful to talk to your child about what he or she did wrong after he or she is calm, and about such behavior not appropriate for proper children.
- Engage your child(ren) with meaningful activities. This might be achieved with cartoons, activity sheets, coloring, painting, little tasks of help and kindness, of course, depending on the age, while you supervise them. It might interest you to know that children are attracted to bright colors. So keep their attention diverted to high-spirited music for children, sing-along rhymes and dance.
- Changing the environment of a child may relieve you of so much effort of calming him or her down. Think of changing a monotonous routine such as taking a walk, visiting a neighbor, gardening, walking the dog, etc. You can thank me later for the peace you experience afterward.
- Children can be amusing at times; they tend to pull off the most outrageous tantrum, especially in public. Hence, a parent needs to know how to calm him or her down when at home, go over proper manners, so that the next time you are at any occasion; she can be that sweet girl or adorable boy everybody wants to be around.
- As a caution, it is of utmost importance to put away hazardous objects out of the reach of children before they either hurt themselves or someone else.
- Please, expose your child to the right cartoon or content on TV. Make sure the content is educative and entertaining as well. This would help to inspire the right and proper behavior in them. So the next time he or she begins with a whimper, you can remind such a child that his or her favorite cartoon icon would never act that way.
The question, however, is, what happens when you become clueless as to what a child wants? May I remind you as a parent that this is normal. Even the most experienced mom finds herself calling her mother at about 3:00 am for help as to how to calm her baby.
For one, I would advise you to seek the help of a doctor if your child’s tears and temper persists. Of course, you’d have studied the time and frequency of such and try to tell the difference between discomfort and hunger. In reality, children, as much as adults, may get cranky once the child did not have a sound sleep the previous night.
Are you finding your way through the turns and corners of calming your child already or you are totally in need of new ideas? Try these; else your next dial should be the doctor.